Books I would like to write

For a long time I wanted to write a book called "The Power of Negative Thinking", but unfortunately someone has beaten me to it. She rather spoils the effect by entitling it The Positive Power of Negative Thinking, presumably because some of the flaky people who buy self-improvement books wouldn't get the point without it. So, to forestall any opportunistic authors stealing my titles just because I'm too lazy to write them, here are some pop psychology books I'd like to write:

• I'll See Your Prozac and Raise You a Xanax
• Post-Feminist Man: How to be an obnoxious sexist slob and still get laid
• Somebody's Got to Lose: How to screw people over and still feel good about yourself.
• Cutting Edge: a young person's guide to self-harm
• Whining and Dining: How to profit from victimhood