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News Roundup
Saturday, June 18th, 2005 12:15 amI'm still waiting for the election results from Iran, so I won't comment on them. Instead, I'll start with some older news from the other end of the Axis of Evil. Oh hang on, China aren't in the Axis, they're on our side because they believe in freedom and democracy, or something like that ...
As if we didn't need another reason to hate Bill Gates, Microsoft are teaming up with the Chinese government to censor the Internet. Well OK, not the whole of the Internet, just MSN Spaces, a service provided for bloggers who don't mind the social stigma of being associated with Microsoft. Words that will be banned on the service include "freedom", "democracy" and even "socialism", not to mention more obvious candidates like "Tibet" or "Falun Gong". Gates' own views on the Chinese government (reported in the same article) are that it represents "a brand new form of capitalism, and as a consumer it's the best thing that ever happened." This, of course, comes from the man who condemned Open Source software and Copyleft as a kind of communism.
I notice that Bill Gates is still in the running in Discovery Channel's Greatest American race, although Mel Gibson has been eliminated, presumably because someone found out that he's Australian. I urge my American readers to tune in and vote for anyone other than Bill Gates. Oh hang on, George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan are in there too. OK, anyone other than Gates, Bush or Reagan. I don't even mind if you vote for Bob Hope - after all, organised crime is as American as apple pie.
But enough of such distasteful matters, and on to the news from our side of the pond, to whit, the EU summit, from which there is no news. To elaborate on this lack of news, the British and French are still fighting each other, a subject which has not been new since the 12th century. "My Lord, we are at war with France!" "Oh God, not again." To elaborate slightly more usefully, the British are still trying to hang on to their EU rebate, and the French are still outraged that any country should get as much as half of what the French take out of EU coffers. This is all to do with complicated calculations about the Common Agricultural Policy, a noble scheme to ensure that small farmers are not squeezed out by agrobusiness. It is pure conincidence that most of these worthy peasants happen to live in France.
Ignoring these minor spats between their neighbours, the German government have passed a bill on a more pressing issue, the "Armenian genocide" of 1915. I put this in scare-quotes, because whether one regards this as genocide is normally determined by political affiliation rather than historical evidence. The issue has been a political football since WWI, and has predictably resurfaced with a vengeance since the European Parliament voted in favour of Turkey's membership application. Naturally, the Turks are not very happy about this, with one Turkish professor commenting that "Germans do not want to be the only nation that committed genocide."
and residents of Ankara protesting at the German Embassy (at least I assume they did - when I was walking past it this lunchtime, the street was filling up with riot police, from whom I learnt about the German thing).
The strange thing about the politics, rather than the history, of what was done to (and by) the Armenians is that even if it were proven that the Ottomans really did kill all those Armenians in eastern Anatolia (while curiously neglecting to do anything about the large Armenian comunity in Istanbul), it ought not to make any difference to current politics, since the Ottoman Empire no longer exists. The Republic of Turkey (which occupies a tiny part of what used to be the Ottoman Empire) was formed in opposition, not only to the occupying Allies, but also to the Sultan and the Young Turk regime (which controlled of the Empire in its last days). It has as much to do with the Ottomans as the Republic of Austria has to do with the Hapsburgs.
Finally, a word of warning from MI5. British holiday-makers may be approached by friendly strangers offering "local hospitality". They should not be fooled into thinking that these are innocent types who want to steal your credit card details or cart you off to a carpet shop once you are too inebriated to know what you are buying and how much you are paying for it. They could be spies! In particular, they could be Russian or Chinese spies. I can just imagine the effect of this on the average British tourist....
"Hello, hello, welcome! You like to drink some Turkish coffee? Very good, very delicious!"
"Psst, George - do you think he's one of those Chinese spies?"
"Oh don't be silly, Mabel, he doesn't even look Chinese!"
"You want see Turkish carpet? Very old, very beautiful!"
"But George, he's so persistent ... and his eyes are a bit, well, narrow."
As if we didn't need another reason to hate Bill Gates, Microsoft are teaming up with the Chinese government to censor the Internet. Well OK, not the whole of the Internet, just MSN Spaces, a service provided for bloggers who don't mind the social stigma of being associated with Microsoft. Words that will be banned on the service include "freedom", "democracy" and even "socialism", not to mention more obvious candidates like "Tibet" or "Falun Gong". Gates' own views on the Chinese government (reported in the same article) are that it represents "a brand new form of capitalism, and as a consumer it's the best thing that ever happened." This, of course, comes from the man who condemned Open Source software and Copyleft as a kind of communism.
I notice that Bill Gates is still in the running in Discovery Channel's Greatest American race, although Mel Gibson has been eliminated, presumably because someone found out that he's Australian. I urge my American readers to tune in and vote for anyone other than Bill Gates. Oh hang on, George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan are in there too. OK, anyone other than Gates, Bush or Reagan. I don't even mind if you vote for Bob Hope - after all, organised crime is as American as apple pie.
But enough of such distasteful matters, and on to the news from our side of the pond, to whit, the EU summit, from which there is no news. To elaborate on this lack of news, the British and French are still fighting each other, a subject which has not been new since the 12th century. "My Lord, we are at war with France!" "Oh God, not again." To elaborate slightly more usefully, the British are still trying to hang on to their EU rebate, and the French are still outraged that any country should get as much as half of what the French take out of EU coffers. This is all to do with complicated calculations about the Common Agricultural Policy, a noble scheme to ensure that small farmers are not squeezed out by agrobusiness. It is pure conincidence that most of these worthy peasants happen to live in France.
Ignoring these minor spats between their neighbours, the German government have passed a bill on a more pressing issue, the "Armenian genocide" of 1915. I put this in scare-quotes, because whether one regards this as genocide is normally determined by political affiliation rather than historical evidence. The issue has been a political football since WWI, and has predictably resurfaced with a vengeance since the European Parliament voted in favour of Turkey's membership application. Naturally, the Turks are not very happy about this, with one Turkish professor commenting that "Germans do not want to be the only nation that committed genocide."
and residents of Ankara protesting at the German Embassy (at least I assume they did - when I was walking past it this lunchtime, the street was filling up with riot police, from whom I learnt about the German thing).
The strange thing about the politics, rather than the history, of what was done to (and by) the Armenians is that even if it were proven that the Ottomans really did kill all those Armenians in eastern Anatolia (while curiously neglecting to do anything about the large Armenian comunity in Istanbul), it ought not to make any difference to current politics, since the Ottoman Empire no longer exists. The Republic of Turkey (which occupies a tiny part of what used to be the Ottoman Empire) was formed in opposition, not only to the occupying Allies, but also to the Sultan and the Young Turk regime (which controlled of the Empire in its last days). It has as much to do with the Ottomans as the Republic of Austria has to do with the Hapsburgs.
Finally, a word of warning from MI5. British holiday-makers may be approached by friendly strangers offering "local hospitality". They should not be fooled into thinking that these are innocent types who want to steal your credit card details or cart you off to a carpet shop once you are too inebriated to know what you are buying and how much you are paying for it. They could be spies! In particular, they could be Russian or Chinese spies. I can just imagine the effect of this on the average British tourist....
"Hello, hello, welcome! You like to drink some Turkish coffee? Very good, very delicious!"
"Psst, George - do you think he's one of those Chinese spies?"
"Oh don't be silly, Mabel, he doesn't even look Chinese!"
"You want see Turkish carpet? Very old, very beautiful!"
"But George, he's so persistent ... and his eyes are a bit, well, narrow."
